Not the royal wedding

I am sitting at home in silence because I cannot stomach watching the royal wedding. I am impressed that a wedding of that size was brought together so quickly - a friend of mine has just announced a save the date for 5.5 years' time! so they can save and get organised - but apart from that, I don't care. I also dislike the amount of attention for what should be a family affair, and am astounded at the hype around it for two people who are already in love, living together occassionally, and so forth, formalising their arrangement. I also don't give two hoots about whether she'll be queen, queen mother, king's wife or whatever.

Why yes, repulican here how did you pick?

So to celebrate something far more interesting and important, here is my favourite photo from my wedding day. Self-portrait, at the end of our photo shoot, freezing our legs off by that stage and keen for a spa, some cake and champagne, and our holiday to begin!

We eloped. We had a lovely holiday. It was cold. My dress was orange, not red as the picture implies.

Our rings are titanium but TheHusband damaged his between pallets at work, so I want to replace that with a simpler one sometime soon.

Our wedding was just one day of our lives together. We're coming up to having had 6 lovely years together, 2 married, 5 homes, 1 child and lots of laughs.

I get a bit teary when I hear of Christchurch and the damage to it, as it's a special magical place in my memory. We are really wanting to go back there sometime soon!

So happy wedding day to all who've had one, all who plan one, and all who love them. I hope that any couple marrying today is as happy as we are.

Why we eloped

I am writing some of our thoughts about marriage and weddings and how we go to here out while it's still fresh in my mind. Just two months ago, I chose to become Mrs ManFriend and I'm lots of things about it still and at the moment. Excited, sure, but also trepidatious. I am the child of parents who divorced after a tumultuous married life. They divorced when I was 11, which is a LONG time ago now really.

My younger siblings don't remember my parents being married, which to me is weird. I don't remember them being happy, or being "together" as such, except for a few times when they went out to dinner. I can remember my dad putting on a dash of Old Spice aftershave and putting on his amazing dress uniform and going to work dinners, but that's about it. I remember going camping when I was fairly young (8 maybe?) and walking a lot with my dad, and of painting his trailer cage when I was maybe 9 or 10, and fishing with my grandparents, but I don't remember doing anything with my mother. I must have, at some stage, as I am a great cook now and can sew somewhat and can knit up a storm (all things I learnt from her) but I don't remember spending time with her when I was young. I remember her having her hair permed and me getting a migraine from it and the kind hairdresser massaging my head to ease the agony. I remember her doing things *for* me but not *with* me, ya know?

Anyways, I now have no relationship with my mother, and that had a big thing to do with us eloping. The discussion went like this:

- let's get married
- shall we have a wedding?
- where (I'm from Sydney and TheMan is Adelaidian)?
- who do we invite?
- do I have to invite my mother?
- how do I not invite her?
- ugh
- glass of wine?
- sure
- what wine do we like?
- marlborough sauvignon blanc
- where's that made?
- let's elope there to get married
- ok

And that's about it. Nothing dramatic - just avoiding having my parents in the same room as each other (something they haven't willingly done in 18 years) and avoiding having to put up with her in my life.

Brief update as my shoulder is sore today...

6 weeks post op. So dot points will have to suffice:

• Saw the surgeon on Monday. I got another gold star for progress and more admonition to slow down and take it easy. Which is funny because I'm hardly doing the exercises I've been given, and I am still so freaking frustrated with the lack of what I *can* do that I'm hardly pushing what I can do.
• On the upside, I can drive again (YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY) and go back to work (yay) next week. I can now do all range of movements, which means I can focus less of don't.do.that and more on the woah protect yourself feeling. Which is fine, but still frustrating.
• Unfortunately, when my shoulder gets sore, the rest of my symptoms come back. Sore neck, amazingly painful spot in my trapezoid, pain down hand, sore spot on ribs... and it makes me want to wail because it is SCARY to know that that pain is still there, just out of reach and view. And I am heartbroken to say that I'm having to face up to the realisation that is slow in coming - that no one is going to fiz me. I have to work through the next 12 months of inflicting pain on myself and pushing myself and encouraging myself to be the bext that I can be.

I am knitting though! Did I mention that I've finished my Perfect Sweater a few weeks ago:


More photos on Flickr as always (and there are mousse photos as well!).

And I've cast on an I Do:

as my wedding day is just 10 weeks away and you know, as it's in New Zealand in April, I wanted something extra to go with my dress. We've set a date - for April Fool's Day (01/04/09) (or 04/01/09 for those in North America!). Anyone who knows us will say "yup that's perfect for you" and those that don't will be aghast, and also be horrified that we firstly wanted to do it on Friday 13th but that's in March (too soon) or November (too far) so AFD it is.

I've gone ring shopping, which was REALLY fun and scary because I've never Shopped Specifically For Jewelry before, ya know? The e rings don't count as I was nervous at that stage and just chose what I loved whereas this time around I'm not as nervous. ManFriend isn't wanting another ring at this stage so I've only had to find one for me. I'm thinking of getting one made to "match" my e ring. Will let you know after the date I guess!

I'm wearing the same dress as I wore for my e party, though I'll want to make a shrug to go with it I think, and find some stockings to make it a bit more suited to the weather!

Cat sitting has been organised.



Not sure what else to say really - it's kind of organised, very fun to sort out an o/s trip, but otherwise pretty easy :). Eloping is fun!

Engagement party planning

Because it's my blog, because I'm in the home stretch of Nablopomo, and because the e party is next Saturday, here are some thoughts:

• I have a dress to wear. It is fabulous. I also have shoes to wear - I have to put some grip on the bottom of them still though!
  

• I'll deal with my hair next week - it may have faded a lot by then and need topping up but it may also be amazing still.

I need to organise a few things:

• food for me and Manfriend
• drinks for us as well
• rubbish bags
• card table
• things to sit on
  
• ice and ice boxes
• balloons so people can find us in the gardens
  
• eyebrow wax
• massage
• camera charged and ready to take photos
• napkins and plates (biodegradable)
• celebratory cupcakes (because I want them and my sister is an amazing pastry chef)
• Long Island Iced Tea (and a container to carry it in)
• ?music
  

Christmas, wedding, surgery...

* Christmas may be interesting this year. Surgery is on 10/12 and I'll have 2 weeks of being unable to move my arm, so it'll still be a case of "help me get dressed please" by that stage. I've politely suggested to the family that I'm not up for traveling 2 hours to celebrate Christmas (as much as I do anyway, which is minimally) and will be having a quiet time at home.

* Wedding plans are on hold at the moment or are going on in so much that we are still talking about it when we get the chance. Money comes into it a lot, and I am waiting until I see my dad in December to pick his brains about the trip we want to make. Well, I want to make - it's hard to get ManFriend to make any moves on this, whereas I desperately need something other than school and my injuries to think about.

* Shoulder surgery is set for 1 month, 1 week and 1 day away. That's kind of poignant. And look I did what any good blogger would do and put up a ticker for it. I have exams x2 between now and then as well. I am wondering how to prepare for the recovery period. I'm a bad patient - I don't rest, I do too much, I fret about things that need doing but not by mem and I am going to struggle to feed and entertain myself for at least 2 weeks if not more. I found a great website on recovery from a broken leg but nothing similar for a shoulder; there are lots of similar things to take away!